I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-C-E. Your child may not be able to spell it, but they most certainly want it! Think back to when you were a child and your parents finally let you ride your bike down the street to the neighbor’s house. It was only 20 feet away, but it felt like freedom pedaling down the driveway. Of all the things that have changed in time, that isn’t one of them. Children crave independence and, as hard as it is for us parents, deserve it.
There is no set rule as to when a child should gain their independence, so analyze each child and adjust it accordingly. Some children are born ready to do things themselves while others may need some coaxing. A great way to start instilling it is to start small and see how they handle it. If they complete the assignment with no problems, give them a little more. If they don’t fair too well, scale it back and give them time to work on it. Always provide ample encouragement along the way!
Another great way to give your children independence is through chores. Younger kids can do things such as gather and sort laundry or pick up the shoes on the floor, while older kids can complete laundry, sweep, mop, etc. There are typically plenty of chores both inside and outside the house, so use this to your advantage!
Here are some additional ways to safely give your children freedom:
- Let them have a say in redecorating their room (paint color, bedding, wall hangings, etc)
- Pick which Bricks 4 Kidz class to take
- Make their own plate at dinner
- Choose what to wear to an important event
- Select the movie for Family Movie Night
- Take care of the family pet
Finally, include them in household decisions. This does not have to be complex…it can be as simple as what to have for dinner or where to go on vacation. Get their insight on household projects like remodeling or ask them for fashion advice for family photos. Even if they are not going to be making the decision, let them give their opinion and ideas for the situation.
The thought of raising an independent child may seem scary, but knowing that one day when they are an adult they can function on their own and make sound decisions is comforting. So, accept them wearing mismatched shorts and shirts, because it can help determine their future!
