You have a lot to do.

But do you ever find yourself at a loss when it comes to deciding what to do next?

There can be various reasons. Maybe you just don’t want to do what needs to be done. Maybe it is boring. Or a little bit hard. Maybe you have so much to do that you don’t even know where to begin.

There can be lots of reasons we have a hard time tackling a project. And it isn’t a problem reserved only for adults. Kids can face the same hurdle, and it can be more debilitating than procrastination. Homework can seem daunting. So can cleaning a room that has gotten a little, shall we say, out of hand.

So what’s a person to do?

You might have heard “Just do what comes next”; “Put one foot in front of the other”; “Do something.”

Those are good ideas. But what do you do when you don’t know what comes next? Where do you begin when you don’t know where the beginning is?

You have to start somewhere. And that is the trick – finding somewhere to start. When you or your child gets stuck on what to do, try these ideas.

  • Make a list.You might make a list of all the things you have to do. Or maybe you only have one thing to do. You simply don’t know where to begin. Make a list of the steps you need to take to do that one thing. Then spend some time putting those steps in order. Make sure that you break the steps into small steps. Baby steps are fine. You’ll have a basic starting point.
  • Ask for help.This can sometimes be the hardest to do, but it can be the one thing that reaps the greatest rewards.There is nothing wrong with asking for help. And kids need to know that it is okay to do so.
  • Get in the right place.This means both mentally and physically. If you’re trying to concentrate but there’s lots going on, you’re going to have a hard time staying focused on the task at hand. Trying to do homework in the family room with the TV blaring and siblings arguing? Not a good idea. Move to a quiet room with plenty of workspace. How about mentally? Try some positive thinking: “I can do this” is much more motivating than “I’ll never figure this out.”
  • Set a time limit. In this instance, you aren’t setting a time limit for when you will finish the task. You are setting a time limit for how long you will work on it initially. Set a timer for 30 minutes. Knowing that a stopping point isn’t far off can help remove some of the anxiety that builds when you feel like you are facing a never-ending task.
  • Um, yeah, but isn’t that the problem? What to do first? Well, start with number one. If it’s homework, start with the first problem. If it’s something else, look at the list of steps you made in #1 above.

As corny as it may sound, when you are having a hard time figuring out what to do, just do something. Any action can help get your momentum going. For our kids we can help them by letting them know that we understand. We’ve been there. Then we can help them figure out the first step in the “What to do?” question.

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